Natalie Portman Shows Her Ass And Shit Around The Web

Pre-preggo Natalie Portman shows off her Queen Amidala bare ass in Planetarium. Her husband loved it, until she rolled over and he realized she was a girl. read more

Actors Are Not People

W Magazine published a spread of actresses young and old who will likely be up for awards this January and February when Hollywood stands in a circle and jerks off on one another. Not the black people obviously. read more

68th Annual Cannes Red Carpet

Cannes started again. Nobody can seem to stop it. Cannes is the annual film event in the South of France where European people you don't know but are quite certain you would hate mix with Americans you know you hate to celebrate movies you will never watch. Roman... read more

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Natalie Portman Seems Grounded

Things I learned from the Hollywood Reporter's gushing interview with Natalie Portman: she's insufferable. Bruce Jenner inquiring if he could have the clit off the woman he killed in the Lexus came off as more humble. Portman has a ton of views on a ton of things all of... read more

Nobody Likes Natalie Portman And Shit Around The Web

Natalie Portman's favorite whine is how Star Wars ruined her life. It seems that after she gave a shitty stilted performance in those steaming turd prequels no one wanted to work with her. Now she can only cry into her fat Lucas paycheck and residuals. Read all about... read more

Chris Hemsworth's Wife Is On the Jealous Side

I don't know why this story bothers me so much. I think it's the sadness sweeping over me knowing that even successful Hollywood actors who could nail any woman end up married to a woman who vagina lashes all the fun out of them. That's metaphysical angst or something.... read more

Natalie Portman Could Use a Decent Meal

Natalie Portman used to be the shit. The bomb. The little Jewish girl who could. I'm not sure what happened to her. She married a gay ballet dancer and they somehow produced a child and then she disappeared after what appears like many months of hardcore fasting. No... read more

Natalie Portman is attractive

Natalie Portman is in Austin today filming a movie with director Terrence Malick, who everyone says is so great, but I thought of looking down her shirt and dressing her up as a slutty country girl way before he did. I had that idea, like, 5 years ago. I even photoshoped... read more

Natalie Portman got married

Whereas Lindsay Lohan claims she can't even breath without hundreds of paparazzi stalking her, much bigger star Natalie Portman got married this weekend and no one knew a thing about it. Six months after very quietly debuting wedding bands at the 2012 Oscars, Natalie... read more

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Natlaie Portman got married

Natalie Portman hasn't said anything official yet, but a jeweler told People magazine that she designed wedding rings for Natalie Portman and Benjamin Millepid, rings they appeared to be wearing Sunday night at the Oscars. Wolf created two diamond rings for Portman, made... read more

Natalie Portman is on a stamp

It's been a big day for PETA apparently, because they also announced a new series of US Postal stamps that have pictures of famous vegetarians on them, including Pam Anderson, Bryan Adams, and Da Vinci. If only DaVinci were alive today so he could feel the pride of being... read more

Natalie Portman gave birth

Wait, was she pregnant? Because you could barely even tell. The actress and fiancé Benjamin Millepied have welcomed a son, PEOPLE has exclusively learned. Portman, 30, met choreographer Millepied on the set of Black Swan, for which she later won an Oscar for Best... read more