Anais Zanotti in a Bikini

October 30, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Real life movements simply aren’t possible when you know dudes with cameras are snapping you. You can’t pick your nose or scratch your ass or adjust your junk. It’s all about tossing the hair and moving like you want the king to pick you out among all the servant girls for his harem where the […]

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Anais Zanotti In A Pink Bikini

July 30, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’m going to go ahead and say pink is this French girl’s color. I once had my color profile done at a mall. The girl shuddered as she told me I was black as death. Then she hurried away in tears screaming about Carcosa. That was awkward. If I could only find a partner like […]

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Anais Zanotti And Ana Braga Touch Each Other Like Broken Birds

April 2, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

These poor girls can’t seem to find their tops. It’s some kind of sickness that seems to befall international girls on the beach particularly dependent on the kindness of strangers to pay their rent. You might think it makes no sense to buy big ole titties only to keep them covered with the fingers your […]

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Anais Zanotti In Not Even a Bikini

March 8, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’m starting to believe these Miami Beach pictures of models from various ports of worldwide naval call might be staged. These girls can’t be standing staring out into the ocean with just a piece of floss wrapped around their ass for hours on end each day. Not when there’s chicken wings to be served at […]

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Anais Zanotti In A Thong

February 19, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’m not sure what this girl’s professional occupation is, but every time she pulls her thong out of her ass, I want to write her a check for $250 with a vaguely worded explanation in the memo line. Now that I think of it, I should probably use cash. Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

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Give Me Back My Damn Bikini Top, You Venezuelean Whore

February 13, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I might be reading into this. And I might be confusing Venezuela with Brazil. I think all of South America was like one piece in Risk. But there’s still nothing finer than seeing two girls with with big fake yabbos and a poor command of the English language grabbing each others bikinis at the beach. […]

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Anais Zanotti in A Thong on Miami Beach

December 5, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

You can’t do much better than a suntanning chick in a thong eating a banana at the beach. It really hits a number of marks. Competition along that particular shoreline is tough. You’ve got your models, your flight attendants, and your better looking community college girls all taking in the sun and you’ve got to […]

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Anais Zanotti And Ana Braga in Bikinis

October 23, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Here’s why this world is so fucking wonderful. Even good looking women need to figure out ways to get noticed if they want to be famous. Having a slamming bikini body and bit tits and long hair and designer sunglasses just isn’t enough. It’s enough to be my girlfriend who I let convince me that […]

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Anais Zanotti Rollerblades In Booty Shorts

October 12, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Hot shorts, rollerblades, and the giant baby sucker might be going one level too deep into cliches for self-described European model Anais Zanotti. Maybe she’s been researching hot to make it in America. She’s missing the red, white, and blue bikini top and the Grave Digger baseball hat. Then I’d give her citizenship. And all […]

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