Hayden Panettiere Dynamo Tits

January 18, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Hayden Panettiere suffered from the asymptomatic version of postpartum depression that caused her to spend much of this past November in rehab with other celebrities suffering from undiagnosed Lyme disease and sex addiction to really attractive female models. Panettiere got her mind right and her enormous fake tits chiropractically adjusted. She’s glowing again. In contrast, […]

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Hayden Panettiere Is Knowingly Pregnant

August 26, 2014 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Hayden Panettiere kept her hand dramatically on her womb most of the Emmys night just in case anybody didn’t realize she was pregnant. For the slower witted, Hayden massaged her teats until a milky like silicon colloid oozed from her nipples. The anorexic tanned hostess from E! caught Hayden referring to the baby as ‘her’ […]

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Wladimir Klitschko Is Testing The Limits Of Hayden Panettiere’s Cervix

May 28, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Wladimir Klitschko is 6-foot-6 and weighs about 245 pounds, while Hayden Panettiere is 3-foot-1 and weighs as much as a bag of grapes, so it’s only natural to imagine him splitting her into a dozen pieces when they have crazy Ukrainian gorilla sex. But whatever his methods, Wladimir has managed to not only keep Hayden […]

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Hayden Panettiere In A Bikini

September 3, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Now this is Labor Day. Sure, the American labor movement has been crushed into near oblivion. Maybe everything we own is now made in a country overseas that changes its name every ten years to try and make people forget that Gary Glitter violated its children. And maybe the blue collar American middle class worker […]

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Hayden Panettiere In A Bikini

May 14, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Guys have some strange fascination with short girls. There’s some unfounded collective belief that all short girls are somehow gymnastically inclined nymphomaniac spinners who fly on and off your member like Sandy Duncan in her Peter Pan harness. I once had sex with a shorter gal. She was grumpy as hell and after sex she […]

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Hayden Panettiere Bikini Cocky

April 1, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Hayden Panettiere can afford to be cocky. When you’re a midget and the entire male world wants to bang the snot out of you, you’re doing well for yourself. She’s also now engaged to Vladimir Klitschko who may or may not own one of the seventeen unofficial heavyweight boxing titles. I stopped watching boxing when […]

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does Hayden Panettiere have breast implants?

December 5, 2012 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

People have been wondering if Hayden Panettiere finally got breasts implants after seeing her in a bra in this weeks episode of ‘Nashville’. And her boobs do look bigger, and a little weird, but it’s probably just a push up bra and some shadows. I’ll go stare at her tits for another hour or so […]

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Hayden Panettiere looks terrific

July 7, 2012 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Hayden Panettiere has been on vacation in Cabo with her boyfriend Scotty McKnight (who for some reason is a receiver for the Jets and not the shy one in a boy band as his name clearly implies), but she didn’t give him a handjob on camera like Adrien Brodys girlfriend did. I don’t know what […]

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Hayden Panettiere makes sports more fun

April 13, 2012 | beach | editor| 0 Comments

Hayden Panettiere played some tennis and basketball, all while in a bikini, yesterday in Hawaii with her boyfriend, New York Jets wide receiver Scotty McKnight, who I’ve never heard of so I assume sucks. She actually looks really good here, and is amazingly photogenic considering she’s moving around and sweating and panting. Between that and […]

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