Tom Cruise Isn’t Checking In With Suri Very Often

September 19, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A new report in InTouch Weekly claims Tom Cruise hasn’t seen his daughter Suri in the past four years. Or about since that time he sued the shit out of  Life and Style magazine for claiming he had abandoned his daughter post-divorce.

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Jamie Foxx Goes Public With Katie Holmes

September 8, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

There’s only so much a wife can endure when her husband refuses to respect Oprah’s furniture. Not only did Tom Cruise damage the upholstery of others, he damaged his marriage as well. This left Katie up for grabs to the next ready and willing Hollywood bachelor, Jamie Foxx.

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Lais Ribeiro Polished Cleavage and Shit Around the Web

June 15, 2017 | crap around the web | Robert Paulsen| 0 Comments

Madison Beer quenches, Naked Southern Belles, and more!

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Katie Holmes And Jamie Foxx Definitely Having Hetero Sex

May 18, 2017 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

According to anonymous sources who are obviously her PR people, Katie Holmes and Jamie Foxx are head over heels in love with each other. You know Holmes is a woman of passion because she signed a contract to remain in an on paper relationship with her previous gay husband for an allotted number of years.

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Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes Going Strong Despite Obstacles

October 26, 2016 | Uncategorized | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Here’s a thing. Half the guys in your high school or college drama programs were gay. The number of openly gay male movie actors approximates zero. Either the reprogramming ministers are working wonders on the Greyhounds to Los Angeles or certain somebodies are finding closeted comfort in the arms of understanding women.

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Jamie Foxx And Katie Holmes On The DL

September 7, 2016 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

According to a report by Radar Online, Katy Holmes and Jamie Foxx have been sneaking around together because her divorce settlement with her gay husband prevents her from publicly dating anyone for five years. This report seems dubious. Contracts which infringe on someone’s basic rights aren’t usually valid. You can’t have someone sign a contract that lets you pistol whip them twice a day.

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Katie Holmes Sagging to Gomorrah

March 14, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Tom Cruise looks like a fabulous million waxed dollars. Katie Holmes looks like it’s time to activate the phone tree of friends to come say their final goodbyes. You can’t even tell which one leads the far higher risk HIV life. It’s likely Cruise reached the top of the ziggurat and obtained Xenu’s book of […]

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Katie Holmes Ass Cheeks in Directorial Debut

August 12, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

If you’ve been waiting for Katie Holmes to direct a movie about a desperate single mom, insightful tranny waitresses swapped into the traditional role of magical Negroes, and the fleecing of the working class in the subprime mortgage crisis of the late 2000’s, save up your dough for a ticket to All We Had. From […]

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Tom Cruise Is Missing And Shit Around The Web

April 7, 2015 | crap around the web | Brendon| 0 Comments

Reports coming out of dead-eyed Katie Holmes’ camp claim that demented dwarf Tom Cruise hasn’t seen his daughter Suri in over a year. Since he owns his own plane, a couple helicopters, and four rickshaw boys from the Canton province, it seems unlikely he’s been unable to find transportation. Read all about Risky Business’ shitty […]

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Jamie Foxx Stops the Games

March 19, 2015 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

If your buddy ever tells you he sucked a dick that one time in college he’s either a liar or bad at it. People rarely change. Dudes buy Harleys because there’s a chick out there with a go to fetish who’s going to hate herself in the morning. That’s why if you were married to a […]

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