Half-Hearted Jim Beam Boycott Cause Mila Kunis Kills Babies

November 10, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A poorly organized hashtag, #BoycottJimBeam, got kicked around the intersection of people who supposedly love Jim Beam but hate abortion, decrying the bourbon maker’s choice of spokeswomen for their Devil’s Cut product. 

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Mila Kunis Gifts Delivery Man Unwrapped Goods

November 7, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Having a hot celebrity open the door topless as you deliver a package is it’s own porn genre and unicorn scenario in real life. But after the description of Mila’s on-purpose nip slip I️ retract wanting to get any glimpse at her areolae until further review. 

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Mila Kunis Abortion Cut Up (VIDEO)

November 6, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Nothing will change this world for the better so much as really rich celebrities recounting virtue signaling pranks during promotional rounds on the late night talk shows.

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Mila Kunis Doesn’t Name Sexist Names

November 4, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A new trend among female celebrities in this election year of I’m With Her is to relay their industry stories of sexism, sexual assault, and patriarchy. Whether recounting actual crimes, or merely cases of male misogyny rampant in the business, the common thread is also not naming names.

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Ashton Kutcher And Mila Kunis Whatever

July 6, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

The inexplicably famous purveyors of awful shit Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis finally got married even though it was widely assumed they already are and people were waiting for them to get into a plane crash. Kunis dropped a nauseating quote which solidified the grey matter sized marble of hatred in my heart for the […]

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Mila Kunis Sued Over Chicken

April 23, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

A fledgling singer who was apparently friends with Mila Kunis while growing up in the Ukraine is suing her for five thousand dollars because Kunis stole her pet chicken when they were kids. Kristina Karo now claims she needs to a shrink because of the emotional trauma, as do I after browsing her Instagram photos. Think […]

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Mila Kunis Happy With Tits

February 6, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Mila Kunis went on Conan and recanted some amusing anecdotes about how women’s tits become engorged with breast milk following pregnancy. Kunis is the first to notice this unusual phenomenon and has been fielding calls from scientists ever since. Turns out they do indeed get larger: “I don’t know how to deal with them because I’ve […]

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Did Lacey Chabert Un-Fuck Her Way Out of Family Guy?

October 1, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Lacey Chabert voiced the role of Meg Griffin the first season of Family Guy but left under unexplained circumstances. She was replaced by Mila Kunis who has helped entertain stoned high school freshmen ever since. Chabert claims she voluntarily left after the first season: “I actually left the show of my own accord. And only […]

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